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Mastering Facebook for dummies Masters

July 22, 2012

On Facebook, you have attention of lots of friends and contacts. Lets club them both in friends. People read (or notice) what you say, even they may not be able to acknowledge it most of the time. Reasons including obvious ones from not agreeing to it, finding it cliched to various other things, to deeper ones like not wanting to show they have seen it, or not wanting to let their presence felt on Facebook (various reasons: e.g. it being Office hours).

Have seen some comments or posts, half in jest, that on Facebook people can be narcissistic. It could be true. It could be just one negative thing which might hit us, if not pay attention to it. Some others being: Time Sink (spending lots of time on it), voyeuristic behavior (just drinking in everything what a somebody might say, without ever acknowledging it), Vanity (or Narcissism in the extreme) – its human to be happy when people like what we say, or how we look.

I think we just need to be aware of the consequences. Narcissism or Vanity: Makes you dependent on other people. Voyuerism: Its cowardly. Time Sink: You got to do your own work.

Basically, I think, whatever we do is okay, as long as we ourselves are fine with it in the long term, while being aware of the consequences. For me ‘Time Sink’ has been a bit of a problem to be honest. What I did to mitigate is that in 2011, I went totally dark on Facebook. That is I won’t like or comment any posts publicily. If I find something irresistible I would just message the person directly. And overall I would try to reduce my time on Facebook. Also I won’t post anything on Facebook. Good thing was I managed to follow my rules, without needing to disconnect from Facebook, as I have seen atleast 4-5 friends do.

Because ultimately I do enjoy it, and value the connections I have. Just that I want to disassociate the negatives which come from it, and which if not checked hurt us. A very common manifestation of that is the love-hate relationship with Facebook which perhaps all of us, have some time had.

So basically, my trick has been to try to be a master of it, without feeling much guilty for things like I am not contributing much. For that whole of 2011, there was not a single post from me for friends, so I was very selfish in a sense. But I am saying, if something is helping us, and not hurting others too much, then its fine. Bottom line is that if you don’t Master facebook. You end up being a Slave.

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